I can't stop eating Thin Mints. Am I going to die?

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Why are you mr. assinflavor notus talkus again?

Where is the rest of the margarine committee? Has the ship set sail for Ickstantilf?

DID THE NASTY GET DONE TO THE PARCH?

I have a bird, flying around me head. It chirps at me and I yell. YELL! It bites me, then, on the ass. I kick it and it goes away for a while, but then comes back with some more birds. They eat out my eyes and I hate it.

Later, I am laying and there are birds in the pillow. They are pecking at my neck. I ask them to stop it. I don't have enough money for all that rent doubling, i say. Ass, they reply.

Great Jesus, one bird's name is Mosley. I have no idea how I even know that. They can't actually talk, even when they said Ass they weren't talking. Maybe my pot roast is out.

I put on a shoe and throw a sock out the window. It lands in a muddy puddle and sits there. Will probably sit there for a while. Later, a lawn mower will be angry.




In four days, I will be a zephorous contradiction on the index page of a logistics text book. I don't even know about logistics but they have a text book. They put my sleeper in the rat. The rat is mad. The rat is not the birds.

The birds are acting funny now, landing on the light. The light is on the ceiling. How are the birds landing upside down? That doesn't even make sense. But they're crazy, or something, maybe. I might have a toothpick in here...

Okay, there you go. Stick that in your weazel. It will only hurt if your weazel is impure. Surely that's not the case, right?

Down here, I am a loosely fitted jean. Up there, I am a s'more.


Don't take me to the diner. I don't like it. The birds are singing, now.

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Where's my pork round? Bedtime? This place needs an old scofflaw.

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Israfel and her crazy-ass Spotlight finally found us. We gave the escape a real college try, but Fanch got his shoelace caught on a tree root halfway up Dan's Mountain, and that bright light just fell right onto us. We gave in, and so here ya go:



Part 1:


Part 2:





noise (noiz)
n.

    1.    . Sound or a sound that is loud, unpleasant, unexpected, or undesired.
        b. Sound or a sound of any kind: The only noise was the wind in the pines.
    c. A complaint or protest.
    d. Rumor; talk.
    e. noises Remarks or actions intended to convey a specific impression or to attract attention
    2. A loud outcry or commotion: the noise of the mob; a lot of noise over the new law.
    3. Physics A disturbance, especially a random and persistent disturbance, that obscures or reduces the clarity of a signal.
    4. Computer Science Irrelevant or meaningless data.
    5. Informal
        a. A complaint or protest.
        b. Rumor; talk.
        c. noises Remarks or actions intended to convey a specific impression or to attract attention

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Hello and Dear Tom Brokejaw,

I was having oppurtunity yesterday to witness to a beautiful brilliance halpening inside the course of a full meal and a lay-down breakfast time. Your news program in the morning or evening or when you are on the televeision talking to the people of our country would be do well to be part of having broadcaset of the story I am telling you about the beautiful brilliance halpening I witnessed.

I was very lucky to be there in the restaurant that actually is a sewage treatment facility where people just sometimes eat their lunch in the cafeteria which actually doesn't serve its own food but is a restaurant in its own right for you can eat there. Right when I was there but I don't belong there I'm not even ever there before this was a first time I was touring the faciiltity as a touring person to view their way of doing work and business I am interested in this things do you know what I saw? I was witnessing a whole beautiful brilliance thing. Do you know what it was?

Tom, mister Brokejaw if you need to be me formal, I was witness there to such a beautiful brilliance thing that I lost my bucket all over the tile of the "cafeteria" floor but that was okay it's really ugly in there. Tom, mister Brokejaw, if you need to be my formalize, what I was witness was such astounding beautiful brilliance as out from the vending machine of soda that said on it "PEPSI" in a very large size type of letters in capital bold on the picture of a PEPSI bottle came from that machine such a beautiful brilliance can of Diet Coke. Tom, mister Brokejaw if you prefer my formal parameter, a Diet Coke can beautiful brilliance came right out of a "PEPSI" vending machine in the cafeteria of the sewage treatment plant that day Tom, mister Brokejaw if you like my tongue lengthwise.

Did you ever on your news programmes of either morning or even night ning see such beautiful and brilliance as this and show it to an audience of wide acceptance like our united stits audienace is here in this counttryr? Do other coutnreis have such united sttist audience as we doo who are so acceptance or tested well? Do you think high rating commercial potention liike I do?

I'm not privy to your information schiol, Tom, mister Brokejaw if you favor sexual positions where you'er on bottom, but if I were I could answer my own quests but only you, Tom, mister Brokejaw if you have nice knees, could broadcast the beautiful brilliance to the nation'swide aweduuecne.

Thank you,
Sir Senior Pastronomer Argument Silverplatter Gondola
African Food Nestwork
Presiding Fabricant Extraordinare
Pardoning, NJ 2035 .0v

f

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They may not be the most obvious entertainers and they are certainly not the loudest, but if you can seek out a story-teller or a halaka, you are in for a treat and an old one at that.
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When somebody commits a mistake or surprises someone, we never fail to say, “Halaka!”
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Congratulations to everyone who voted for Halaka in the cover contest. You guessed right!

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I'm not sure who anybody is.

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